Much has been ado lately about a certain advertissment for Cheerios, a liberal pro-child, pro-bee, pro-miscegenation breakfast cereal. The advertisement in question which is viewable on my wheb page, features an interracial family – a white mother, an African-American immigrant father, and their mulatto female child daughter. This advertissment has garnered attention, because its blatant pro-child pro-melanin bias caused a torrent of righteous indignation on youtube, such that Cheerios felt that they needed to disable to comments section, which was filled with references to racial genocide and troglodytes.
As usual when it comes to these polarized debates, the right and the left attack and censor each other, and nothing is advanced by either side. So allow me to insert some reasoned, common sense into this matter.
If we look at facts and statistics, it is clear that it is in fact the interracial family, as well as the Cheerios themselves who are the real racists, and not the youtube commentators.
In the United States, the Greatest Country in the History of America, being a Blackman, or a Blackman female means being oppressed by whole slew of disadvantages, from health to income to discrimination in hiring and subprime lending. Blackmen on average live 5 years less than whitemen, and have higher incidence of diabetes, high blood pressure and other illnesses associated with poverty and poor nutrition. Teenaged Blackmen partake of recreational drugs at the same rate as teen whitemen, yet are arrested ten times as often. On average, an African American will get a 20% longer sentence for committing the same crime as a real American, while Blackmen are 20% more likely to get sentenced to prison than Whitemen when convicted of the same crimes. All-white Juries are 16% more likely to convict African Americans than they are of Native Americans – i.e. Obese White Americans. And finally the median Black income is only 60% of the median White income.
These data have been used by liberals to argue that Blackmen are the victims of discrimination and racism. But this ignores the most crucial fact – given all of these statistics, why on earth would anyone choose to be Black, unless they hate white people? I mean there’s just no other explanation! And for all of those dogmatic liberals who argue that Blackmanism is not a choice, Michael Jackson did it, and look at how much money he made! There is just no more denying it – anyone who isn’t white is obviously a hateful racist – and that’s exactly why we always discriminate against them!
So in this Cheerios advertissment, not only has the father chosen to be a Black immigrant, spitting in the faces of all white Americans, but his white wife has chosen to marry him, over the more than 100 million white males in this country! What can be more racist than that?
Further, the Cheerios themselves chose to reside on the chest of the blackman at the end of the video, a clear example of Cheerios’ pro-melanin bias.
Finally, note that the man in the video is lying on the couch, sleepy and exhausted. As we explained in episode 8, it has been scientifically proven that exposure to children dramatically lowers testosterone in males. This of course is the reason for Michael Jackson’s feminine voice – low testosterone is associated with fatigue and low business drive, both of which the supine blackman is clearly suffering from.
The obvious subtext behind the advertissment is a secret message to children: by encouraging your parents to choose a racist life of poverty and discrimination, over whiteness and prosperity, and by leeching the business drive out of the American male, a Child-Cheerios alliance can destroy America as we know it.