Good evening. Ladies and gentlemen, especially obese straight white gentlemen
Today I’d like to talk to you about one of the greatest threats to our civilization today: the homosexual marriage.
Now I have the deepest sympathy for the homosexual race. Homosexualism is a very serious illness which affects millions of conservative Americans, including up to one in two prominent conservative politicians.
The fact that the homosexualists now want the right to get married is actually a positive development. This tells us that they no longer want to be social outcasts, having pervert sex inside of eachothers’ poopie holes. They want to be just like everyone else, having normal sex, inside of eachothers’ wives and children, like normal christian Americans do.
Contrary to all of the hype, there’s nothing immediately dangerous about homosexual marriage from a conservative perspective. No properly raised child will want to become a homosexualist pervert just because he sees a pair of handsome married gaymen, any more than a normal child will want to become an African should he see a Negro businessman. As we all know, homosexualism is spread by contact with blood, not by visual stimulation.
However, as with any policy changes, we need to think about the long term implications of homosexualist marriage. Marriage exists in order to promote family. If we allow two men, or two women to marry, then what comes next? Chinese? All we need to do is look at what’s happened to other countries that have implemented these sorts of policies:
The communist Peoples’ Republic of China has allowed Chinese marriage since it was founded in 1949. And just look at the results: today nearly 100% of those people are Chinese! And the remaining .1% are Mongols and Ko-reans!! All it took was 65 years of asiatic marriage and there aren’t even any americans left!
So I ask all of you millions of conservative homosexualists out there – look in the mirror: you may be a pervert abomination, but at least you’re white! That’s one thing you can be proud of. Do you want the Chinaman to take even that away from you?
The homosexual marriage, while laudable in and of itself, must be sacrificed on the front lines of the war against the Asiatic menace. Homosexuals can be commended for their desire to become more like normal humans. But allowing homosexuals to marry and breed will just result is more and more homosexual perverts, not less. As we learned in episode 2 of the podcast, it is the environment that causes homosexualism. And therefore, if left wing homosexual Americans truly want to become real Americans, they should join with conservatives to abolish the environment today.
This has been the Dick Hatenberg Conservative podcast. Remember that dicksense is just common sense.
Thank you, and good night.